Have you ever gotten upset with others because they don’t have the same vision as you? Sometimes you’ve gotten upset over something as insignificant as not wanting to eat the same thing as you? Sure you have. We’ve all been there. So what to do?
If you’re anything like me, these seemingly insignificant differences sometimes rock my emotional foundation. However, what I am slowly beginning to learn is that just because people that you care about differ from your vision, doesn’t mean they don’t care about you. Sometimes these differences start to affect the way you think about this person, or you start to question if they even care about you at all.
The problem is that most of us expect to be treated or loved in the way we show them we care and love them. But the truth is, very rarely is this case. More than likely, in the other person’s mind, they are showing you they love you just as much as you think you are showing them.
The solution I believe comes down to acceptance, no matter what. I’ve also realized this: Just because someone loves you it doesn’t mean they want to spend all their time with you, maybe they think of your time together as precious, but also one that must be done in small doses. This, is an example of what we must be okay with. I’m sure there are many people in your life you feel the same way about (small doses), only difference being that it doesn’t feel so good when the shoe is on the other foot.
In my opinion, the best way to handle such relationships is as follows:
Tip one: Let go of expectations.
Stop expecting the relationship to be as you once envisioned it would be. This will allow the new relationship, as it stands, to flourish and grow in its own way.
Tip two: Release
If something was said or done that you didn’t like, find a way to spin things around for the better. This will not only release you from getting upset, but it will also prevent any resentment from forming. If this relationship is to stand a chance at surviving and growing in a beautiful new way, then you must learn to not sweat the small stuff. Meaning, don’t take everything so personally.
Tip three: Stop overthinking
When we’re in the middle of such relationships it’s easy to knit-pick. You notice everything they say and do, and you dissect it with a fine tooth comb. This is a mistake. This is only searching for problems. Don’t assume anything. Chances are, anything that you’ve interpreted as ‘against’ you, it likely wasn’t the case.
Whether we want to admit or not, relationships are sometimes tough to maneuver—especially when they mean a lot to us. This is why learning new ways to deal with each other can be the best remedy to healing. I hope you found these tips helpful, I know for me these tips are transforming my relationships for the better.
Till Next Time!